She Shoots....She Scores!!!
I'm going bowling tomorrow! Pray to the Bowling Gawds it is not at the same bowling alley that you're going to....and if it is...just let me apologise right here and now.
I am so sorry I dropped the ball on your foot
I am so sorry I hit you up side the head, honestly, I was not aiming at you at all.
I am so sorry you were blinded by those big honkin' zeros that keep flashing everytime my score came up.
I am so sorry you peed yourself laughing at my wind-up/outfit/face plant (take yer pick here).
I have never bowled before....and I got a feeling it's gonna show.
I remember being in a bowling alley once. I was thinking it was to chaperone a party when I was about 17...but hell, at 17 I woulda been the party and no one in their right mind woulda put me in charge of real live children. I am thinkin' I went in to find a friend... to go to a party....but whatever the case, I never touched a bowling ball. A little voice in my head is telling me I should keep it that way!
I beg to differ.
How hard can it be?
I was good at sports. I skated for years, played hockey, baseball, basketball (well okay...not my best sport, I'm 5'4"...not alot to work with there), volleyball and rollerskated....once...and we are not going to talk about that right now! So okay...I was some good at some sports....bowling is a sport isn't it?
I got the outfit...and really people...does anything else matter? I am told I have to rent shoes...why I don't know since I already have a closet full of fashionable footwear. And since you have to throw the ball...wait...rollll thhheee baaalll, what's with the rental shoes? Am I to assume that at some point you must also kick the ball as well? That would make sense then..the rental shoes, don't want to scuff the pumps now do we!
The Boy tells me I should hope it is five pin and not ten pin. But wouldn't ten pin be a bigger target? He says that five pin is a smaller lighter ball. I can see the cards getting stacked right against me from the get go...smaller lighter ball and smaller target...how's that a good thing? I ask him how you get your fingers out of the holes when you go to throw the ball.....he says you just release your grip....and begged me not to throw myself down the lane with the ball....oh no...not out of concern for my safety.....he is sure my identity will be traced back to him and everybody in the friggin' world will know I am his mother.
I have heard there is a rolling 'cold drink' cart there. That sounds promising! My Ex-best friend M ( I am so not over the Guinness Book of Records thing!) told me to go ahead and drink, since I'm not the one driving....til I reminded her it will be her van I'd be pukin' in. She ain't so keen on it now.
Nope...come hell or high water...cold drink cart or not....I am determined I will get that ball down the alley at least once without insult or injury to all surrounding parties.
I can do this....I got the outfit!
I am so sorry I dropped the ball on your foot
I am so sorry I hit you up side the head, honestly, I was not aiming at you at all.
I am so sorry you were blinded by those big honkin' zeros that keep flashing everytime my score came up.
I am so sorry you peed yourself laughing at my wind-up/outfit/face plant (take yer pick here).
I have never bowled before....and I got a feeling it's gonna show.
I remember being in a bowling alley once. I was thinking it was to chaperone a party when I was about 17...but hell, at 17 I woulda been the party and no one in their right mind woulda put me in charge of real live children. I am thinkin' I went in to find a friend... to go to a party....but whatever the case, I never touched a bowling ball. A little voice in my head is telling me I should keep it that way!
I beg to differ.
How hard can it be?
I was good at sports. I skated for years, played hockey, baseball, basketball (well okay...not my best sport, I'm 5'4"...not alot to work with there), volleyball and rollerskated....once...and we are not going to talk about that right now! So okay...I was some good at some sports....bowling is a sport isn't it?
I got the outfit...and really people...does anything else matter? I am told I have to rent shoes...why I don't know since I already have a closet full of fashionable footwear. And since you have to throw the ball...wait...rollll thhheee baaalll, what's with the rental shoes? Am I to assume that at some point you must also kick the ball as well? That would make sense then..the rental shoes, don't want to scuff the pumps now do we!
The Boy tells me I should hope it is five pin and not ten pin. But wouldn't ten pin be a bigger target? He says that five pin is a smaller lighter ball. I can see the cards getting stacked right against me from the get go...smaller lighter ball and smaller target...how's that a good thing? I ask him how you get your fingers out of the holes when you go to throw the ball.....he says you just release your grip....and begged me not to throw myself down the lane with the ball....oh no...not out of concern for my safety.....he is sure my identity will be traced back to him and everybody in the friggin' world will know I am his mother.
I have heard there is a rolling 'cold drink' cart there. That sounds promising! My Ex-best friend M ( I am so not over the Guinness Book of Records thing!) told me to go ahead and drink, since I'm not the one driving....til I reminded her it will be her van I'd be pukin' in. She ain't so keen on it now.
Nope...come hell or high water...cold drink cart or not....I am determined I will get that ball down the alley at least once without insult or injury to all surrounding parties.
I can do this....I got the outfit!
posted by Nad at 11:02 p.m.
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